If you don't want to be alone, don't be !!!!
MARRIAGE BOOK OK
MARRIAGE QUOTES (For Better or Worse Marriage Humor).
If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company. Jean Paul Sartre
(Ok, so you have to be a married man for these to really hit home ...)
JOKES (One-Liners that sum up what marriage is really like).
BACHELORS
A Bachelor of Arts is one who makes love to a lot of women, and yet has the art to remain a bachelor. Helen Rowland
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. Phyllis Diller
Somehow a bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. Helen Rowland
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too. H. L. Mencken
Do not let your bachelor ways crystallize so that you can't soften them when you come to have a wife and a family of your own. Rutherford B. Hayes
I've never been a manipulator, even in my bachelor days. I never wanted to do things to people that could catch up with me later on. Matthew McConaughey
I don't miss anything by being a bachelor. I don't know any happily married couples, not even my parents. Lemmy
I don't think I'm destined to be the eternal bachelor. Jesse Metcalfe
In my bachelor days, the priority wasn't learning to cook. Rob Lowe
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.Helen Rowland
When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married. William Shakespeare (Much Ado About Nothing)
BE MARRIED (TO / WITH)
I don't want to be married just to be married. I can't think of anything lonelier than spending the rest of my life with someone I can't talk to, or (even) worse, someone I can't be silent with.
If you're not married, chances are you think a lot about you(rself). Tracy McMillan
It seems likely / the likelihood is that ...
COMMUNICATION
Brevity is the soul of wit. William Shakespeare
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin
I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation. George Bernard Shaw
I am not a speed reader. I am a speed understander. Isaac Asimov
It's understandable and almost touching that we should expect our partners to understand us without us having explained / having to explain what's up / going on
Polite conversation is rarely either. Fran Lebowitz
The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.George Bernard Shaw
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Plato
Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind. Rudyard Kipling
COURTSHIP
Courtship is to marriage, as a very witty prologue to a very dull play. William Congreve
Flirting is a woman’s trade, one must keep in practice. Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë
I profess not to know how women's hearts are wooed and won. To me they have always been matters of riddle and admiration. Washington Irving
In courtship, who wins and who loses will determine who passes on their DNA to tomorrow. (H. Fisher)
Life is a matter of courtship and wooing, flirting and chatting. Carolyn See
This is courtship all the world over: the man all tongue; the woman all ears. Emily Murphy
There used to be a time when I believed that courtship was necessary for marriage. I guess this came from the tradition in my family whereby courtship preceded marriage.
Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably. William Shakespeare (Much Ado About Nothing)
DIVORCE
Catholics don't believe in divorce. We do believe in murder. There's always Confession, after all.
Disagreements over money are the biggest cause of divorce.
Divorce is the second worst event in a person’s life. The worst event, of course, is marriage.
Divorce isn't such a tragedy. A tragedy's staying in an unhappy marriage, teaching your children the wrong things about love. Nobody ever died of divorce.
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you're allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.
In college, I had a course in Latin, and one day the word "divorce" came up. I always figured it came from some root that meant "divide". In truth, it comes from "divertere" which means "to divert".
It wasn't about being happy or unhappy. I just didn't want to be me anymore.
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
Taking a thing apart is always faster than putting something together. This is true of everything except marriage.
You can always improve your situation. But you do so by facing it, not by running away.
When you loved someone and had to let them go, there will always be that small part of yourself that whispers, "What was it that you wanted and why didn't you fight for it?
GETTING MARRIED
Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted the whole day
Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and (then) when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.Zsa Zsa Gabor
I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late.
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house. Lewis Grizzard
It's true that all men are born free and equal, but some of them get married!
When I get married, it'll be no secret. Elvis Presley
JOKES
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying for it."
HONEYMOON
A husband may forget where he went on his honeymoon, but he never forgets why.
A honeymoon is a short period of doting between dating and debting.
A honeymoon is a short period of doting between dating and debting.
A love affair should always be a honeymoon. And the only way to make sure of that is to keep changing the man; for the same man can never keep it up.
Honeymoon lasts not nowadays above a fortnight. Samuel Richardson
Honeymoons don't last forever.
Nine out of ten honeymoons are flowerless. A ghastly disappointment.
Syn. dreadful, very bad
Simple misunderstanding… and couple forget the lovely moments they spent before marriage and during honeymoon.Girdhar Joshi
Simple misunderstanding… and couple forget the lovely moments they spent before marriage and during honeymoon.Girdhar Joshi
Some of the most memorable honeymoons have been spent entirely in a hotel room.
The honeymoon is the only period when a woman isn't trying to reform her husband.
There seems to be an unwritten law that
going on honeymoons is like joining the Masons ... secret and
mysterious, and the fewer questions asked the less embarrasing for everybody.
Women have to be careful to not wear out their husbands on their honeymoons, or they get so weak that they can't go to work!
HUSBANDS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. Proverb.
All that a husband or wife really wants is to be pitied a little, praised a little, and appreciated a little.
Having had five husbands, I guess I should know a thing or two about marriage. Joan Collins
Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives. Marilyn Monroe.
I believe that women know if their husbands are unfaithful. They feel it. Coretta Scott King
I was married a few times, and one of my husbands was jealous of me writing. Maya Angelou.
Maids want nothing but husbands, and when they have them, they want everything. William Shakespeare.
Unmarried girl (dated), 2 domestic servant.
My mother's mother is a very tough cookie / woman. She buried three husbands. Two of them were just napping. Rita Rudner
My observation is that women are merely waiting for their husbands to assume leadership. James Dobson
The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin. Honore de Balzac.
You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives / exes. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work. Lee Trevino.
Your husband is not responsible for your happiness. Ngina Otiende
Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed. Geoffrey Chaucer.
HUSBANDS
Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives. Marilyn Monroe
If women believed in their husbands they would be a good deal happier and also a good deal more foolish. H. L. Mencken
It's not beauty but fine qualities, my girl, that keep a husband.Euripides
My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping. Rita Rudner
The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.”Ann Bancroft
Your husband is not responsible for your happiness. You are! It's your job to heal yourself, not his. Ngina Otiende
HUSBANDS & WIVES
After a quarrel, the wife says, "You know, I was a fool when I married you". And the husband replies, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."
All that a husband or wife really wants is to be pitied a little, praised a little, and appreciated a little.
Husbands and wives, first be faithful to each other. Second, keep the romance going all of your life by courting each other every day. Zig Ziglar
Husbands and wives generally understand when opposition will be vain. Jane Austen
JEALOUSY
Mary Theresa Schmich
For me, I'm not a jealous person. That's just not my thing. You have to have trust in your relationship. Fergie
He that is jealous is not in love. Saint Augustine
Jealousy is all the fun you think they had. Erica Jong
Jealousy is just a lack of self-confidence.
Jealousy is the jaundice of the soul. John Dryden
Syn. 1. Ictericia, (icterus: yellowing of skin), 2. figurative (cynicism, bitterness).
The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves. William Penn
The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. Mary Theresa Schmich
To jealousy, nothing is more frightful than laughter. Francoise Sagan
Syn. horrifying, terrifying, unpleasant, nasty
You can be the moon and still be jealous of the stars. Gary Allan
LOVE
A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. Elbert Hubbard.
Anyone who has never owned a dog can’t know what loving and being loved mean.
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. Lao Tzu
Don't forget to love yourself. Soren Kierkegaard
Don't ignore the love you DO have in your life by focusing on the love you DON'T. Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass
First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity. George Bernard Shaw.
Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship - never. Charles Caleb Colton
Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. The Kindly Ones, Neil Gaiman
Syn. figurative, slang (cause emotional problems), sentimientos, complicar.
I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love. Santa Teresa de Calcuta
I think it is all a matter of love: the more you love a memory, the stronger and stranger it is. Vladimir Nabokov
I'd rather be respected than loved.
If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it’s yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be.
If you love something let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If not, it never was.
If you're in love and there's that chemistry, that's what it's all about. Sanaa Lathan.
If you judge people, you have no time to love them. Santa Teresa de Calcuta
It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not. Andre Gide
Love and a cough cannot be hid(den). George Herbert
Love and friendship exclude each other.
Love ceases to be a pleasure, when it ceases to be a secret.
Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. Franklin P. Jones.
Love has reasons which reason cannot understand.
Love hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love. The Kindly Ones, Neil Gaiman
Love is sweet torment.
Love isn't something you find. Love is something that finds you.
Love is what you've been through with somebody.
Love is a serious mental disease. Platon
Love is a temporary insanity curable by marriage. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than the patient. A. Bierce
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. Robert Frost
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. H. L. Mencken
Love isn't there to make us happy. I believe it exists to show us how much we can endure.
Love looks through a telescope; (while) envy, through a microscope. Josh Billings.
Love makes us crazy, marriage cuckolds and patriotism cruel imbéciles.
Love me or hate me..Either way you're thinking of me / I'm on your mind!
Love meant jumping off a cliff and trusting that a certain person would be there to catch you at the bottom. Jodi Picoult
Love shouldn’t require Windex to be clear. It either is or it isn’t. (a glass cleaner).
Love your enemies enough so that you won't think of them as your enemies anymore.
Loving someone is giving them the power to break your heart, but trusting them not to. Julianne Moore
Man can do what he wills but he cannot will what he wills. Arthur Schopenhauer
Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary.
Nice people don't necessarily fall in love with nice people.
Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.
The man loves danger and sport. That is why he loves woman, the most dangerous of all sports.
The most beautiful words are not “I love you”, but “it’s benign”.
The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.
The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost. Chesterton
To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead. Bertrand Russell.
True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen.
We accept the love (that) we think we deserve. Stephen Chbosky
We can recognize the dawn and the decline of love by the uneasiness we feel when alone together. Jean de La Bruyère.
Figurative, (literario): beginning, nacimiento, alba.
We love life, not because we are used to living but because we are used to loving.
We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone. Orson Welles
When one loves somebody everything is clear -- where to go, what to do -- it all takes care of itself and one doesn't have to ask anybody about anything. Maxim Gorky
When I say I love you, I actually do, I don't say it just to make conversation. M. Cuisine
Without being and remaining oneself, there is no love.
You cannot love a fellow creature fully till you love God C.S. Lewis
You have never loved me. You have only thought it pleasant to be in love with me. Henrik Ibsen (A Doll's House)
SHAKESPEARE QUOTES ON LOVE
Don't waste your love on somebody, who doesn't value it.
Love is too young to know what conscience is.
Love me or hate me, both are in my favor. If you love me, I'll always be in your heart. If you hate me, I'll always be in your mind.
They do not love that do not show their love.
OSCAR WILDE QUOTES ON LOVE
A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her.
Love is not blind, it is far-sighted: the proof lies in the fact that it begins to see defects as they gradually slip away.
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry. Oscar Wilde
Who, being loved, is poor?
LORD BYRON QUOTES ON LOVE
Absence - that common cure of love.
MARRIAGE
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Marriage is the best magician there is. In front of your eyes it can change an exciting, cute little dish into a boring dishwasher. Ryan O'Neal
slang, figurative, dated (attractive person) (coloquial) bombón n.
Marriage requires you to say “I do” not just to the person standing in front of you on your wedding day. Marriage requires you to say "I do" to whom(ever) and whatever that person will become, something unknown on your wedding day. It's not knowing who your spouse will become one day that makes the act of marrying a leap of faith. Or to put it less religiously, it's what makes marriage a grave and foolish risk.
Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life.
A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.
A marriage is like a house. When a light bulb goes off you don't go to find a new house, you fix the light bulb.
1. bomb: explode, 2. alarm: sound, (alarma), 3. informal (food: spoil)
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. Oscar Wilde
Marriage is a full-time job; wooing is your application, courtship your interview, engagement your job offer, and honeymoon, your orientation.
Marriage is an institution in which / where a man loses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's (degree).
What's the difference between a marriage and a mental hospital? At a mental hospital you have to show improvement to get out.
You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work. Lee Trevino
MARRIAGES
A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers. Robert Quillen
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
I regret that I wasn't more successful with my marriages, but it is what it is. Ted Turner
I understand why marriages break up over golf. I can't even talk about my own handicap because it's too upsetting. Shia LaBeouf
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages. Friedrich Nietzsche.
Remember that children, marriages, and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get. H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
There may be good, but there are no pleasant marriages. Rainer Maria Rilke.
They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning. Clint Eastwood
Women leave their marriages when they can't take any more. Men leave when they find someone new.
MARRIAGE BY MEN
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. M. de Montaigne
A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. Andre Maurois
A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it. John Steinbeck
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
Mignon McLaughlin.
1. verbs followed by gerund or infinitive withe different meanings: begin, dread, forget, go on, keep, like, mean, need, regret, remember, stop, try, used to ...)
2. verbs followed by gerund or infinitive with very small difference in meaning: hate, like, love and prefer (In American English, the forms with to-infinitive are much more common than the -ing form.
The -ing form emphasises the action or experience. The to-infinitive gives more emphasis to the results of the action or event. We often use the -ing form to suggest enjoyment (or lack of it), and the to-infinitive form to express habits or preferences.
As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take the course he will, he will be sure to repent. Socrates
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.
If there is such a thing as a good marriage, it is because it resembles friendship rather than love. Michele de Montaigne.
In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find and continue to find grounds for marriage.
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages. Friedrich Nietzsche
It's not always been a happy marriage. I guess I wanted a quick fix. David Byrne
Inf. (repairs): parche, arreglo.
It is true that love is blind but marriage is definitely an eye-opener.
It's weird, marriage. It's like this license that gives a person the legal right to control their spouse / their 'other half. Jess C. Scott (Blind Leading Another)
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. Benjamin Franklin.
Marriage, a market which has nothing free but the entrance. Michele de Montaigne
Marriage can wait. Education cannot... because a society has no chance of success if its women are uneducated. Khaled Hosseini
Marriage is a full-time job; wooing is your application, courtship your interview, engagement your job offer, and honeymoon, your orientation. Matshona Dhliwayo
(You know what) they say: Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. Joey Adams
Marriage is a matter of give and take; nothing can / could be further from the truth; so what your husband doesn't give you, you have to take.
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution? Groucho Marx
Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair(ing) kit. Billy Connolly
Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. Gilbert Keith Chesterton.
Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. Joey Adams
Marriage is like a game of chess, except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome. Jerry Seinfeld
Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. Woody Allen
Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.
Marriage is neither heaven nor hell, it is simply purgatory. Abraham Lincoln.
Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse. P.G. Wodehouse (The Small Bachelor)
Marriage is not a word, but / it's a sentence; a life sentence. Rodney Dangerfield
Marriage is not about (being the "right") age; it's about finding / being with the right person.
Marriage is not just about love. It is more than that. It is about commitment, giving, taking and understanding.
Marriage is not just having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.
Marriage, n: / is the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two. Ambrose Bierce
Marriage must incessantly contend with a monster that devours everything: familiarity. Honore de Balzac
As the old saying goes "familiarity breeds contempt":The better we know people, the more likely we are to find fault with them.
Only choose in marriage a man whom you would choose as a friend if he were a woman. Joseph Joubert
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. Groucho Marx
Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through
being the right mate. Barnett R. Brickner
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. Henny Youngman
There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again. Clint Eastwood.
There may be good, but there are no pleasant marriages. Rainer Maria Rilke
They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake. Alexander Pope
They say marriage is like a workshop. (Where) the man works and the women shops.
version: My husband and I are doing a workshop, He works and I shop.
To keep your marriage brimming , whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.
Syn: (healthy, strong, fresh)
When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory. Friedrich Nietzsche.
Where there's marriage without love, there will be love without marriage. Franklin Franklin
Women leave their marriages when they can't take any more. Men leave when they find someone new. J. Courtney Sullivan.
MARRIAGE BY WOMEN
A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished. Zsa Zsa Gabor.
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him. Marilyn Monroe.
Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance. Jane Austen
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. Mae West
Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. Erma Bombeck
In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. Rita Rudner
(Indeed), marriage is a matter of give-and-take. Whether its having an argument or making a marriage work, it does take two to tango. Amy Bloom
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. Mae West
Only after I faced the unhappiness of my first marriage did I start on the path of personal growth. Judith Wright
Seeing unhappiness in the marriage of friends / others, I was content to have chosen music and laughter as a substitute for a husband. Elsa Maxwell
There were three of us in this marriage, so it was a bit crowded. Princess Diana
There are four of us in my family. (If you say "I am four," it means you are four years old, therefore "we are four" means "we are all four years old.")
MARRIAGE EQUALITY
Marriage equality is not an issue of politics: it is an issue of justice achieved by political means. Andy Dunn
Marriage equality changed life for people. Andrew Cuomo.
Marriage equality is not a choice. It is a legal right. Cory Booker
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
Mae West
Love is blind; marriage is the eye-opener. Pauline Thomason
When I eventually met Mr. Right, I had no idea that his first name was Always. Rita Rudner
Never hate a man enough to give him his diamonds back. Zsa Zsa Gabor
No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. HL Mencken
MARRYING / TO MARRY
A girl must marry for love - and keep on marrying until she finds it. Zsa Zsa Gabor.
A lot of people have been romantically in love with somebody who they feel wasn't appropriate to marry. Helen Fisher
All short women have a delayed fuse. Marry a taller woman: My wife was an inch or two taller than me; it's a sign of security. Mel Brooks
Beauty makes life easier. People want to do things for you. They want to marry you and pay for everything. Jerry Hall
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates.
Don't be fretting... about me marrying. Marrying's a trouble and not marrying's a trouble and I sticks to the trouble I knows. L.M. Montgomery
Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for. Mae West.
Don't marry someone you would not be friends with if there was no sex between you. William Glasser
Don't / Never marry the one / person (you think) you can live with, marry only the one / the person / the individual (you think) you cannot / can't live without. James Dobson
Version: You don't marry someone you can live with, you marry the person who you cannot live without. Aleatha Romig.
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. Mae West.
I like actors very much, but to marry one would be like marrying your brother. You look too much alike in the mirror. Marilyn Monroe.
I'll never get married again, and I always hate to say never to anything, but I will never marry again. Halle Berry
I'll never have a wedding. I don't want to marry just to do what everybody else is doing.
Mr. T (Lawrence Tureaud).
I've never met a girl who could stop me looking at all the others. If I did, I'd marry her. Lemmy.
I respect a woman too much to marry her. Sylvester Stallone.
If men knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they'd never marry.
O. Henry
If you are afraid of loneliness, don't / do not marry. Anton Chekhov.
If you would have a good wife, marry one who has been a good daughter. Thomas Fuller
1. If you would have a superpower, what would be ?
2. If you would have a thing well done, do it yourself. Saiti saikau,
It is most unwise for people in love to marry. George Bernard Shaw
Marry me and I'll never look at another horse! Groucho Marx.
Marry Prince William? I'd love that. Who wouldn't want to be a princess? Britney Spears.
Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it. Josh Billings.
Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed. Oscar Wilde.
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed. Albert Einstein.
Most people marry their mother. I married my father. Wayne Gretzky
Never marry at all, Dorian. Men marry because they are tired, women, because they are curious: both are disappointed. Lord Henry in "The picutre of Dorian Gray, (Oscar Wilde)
One should always be in love. That is the reason (why) one should never marry. Oscar Wilde.
Remember, it's as easy to marry a rich woman as a poor woman. William Makepeace Thackeray
Some of the reason why we marry the wrong people is that we don't really understand ourselves. Alain de Botton
Strong women only marry weak men. Bette Davis
The first time you marry for love, the second for money, and the third for companionship. Jackie Kennedy.
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. Cher.
There is not one in a hundred of either sex who is not taken in when they marry.
Jane Austen
informal, often passive (deceive)
There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. Oscar Wilde
To marry / Marrying means to halve your rights and double the duties. Friedrich Nietzsche.
Mean + gerund expresses what the result of an action will be, or what will be necessary. The word mean could be replaced by the word involve.
1. If you take that job in London it will mean travelling for two hours every day.
2. Buying this jacket now means not buying another until next year.
3. Leaving school would mean finding a job.
4. (For many), marrying means having a spouse and kids who would stop them from having fun.
5. Marrying means having a home and a family,
Mean + infinitive expresses an intention or a plan. The word mean could be replaced by the word intend.
1. I mean to finish this job by the end of the week.
2. I didn't mean to hurt you.
3. I meant to return the books on time.
(In our monogamous part of the world), to marry means to halve one's rights and double one's duties. Arthur Schopenhauer
To marry is to halve (to reduce by half) your rights and double your duties.
To marry unequally is to suffer equally. Henri Frederic Amiel
You can date whoever you want, but you should marry the nerds and the good guys. Sheryl Sandberg
Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. Phyllis Diller.
When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living. Helen Rowland
Women marry men hoping / with the hope they will change, and men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. Albert Einstein
JOKES
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.
Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?. Dad: That happens in most countries, son.
MARRIED LIFE
Inventors don't have time for married life. Nikola Tesla
The boredom of married life inevitable destroys love, when love has preceded marriage. Stendhal
The problem in public life is learning to overcome terror; the problem in married life is learning to overcome boredom. Gabriel García Márquez (Love in the Time of Cholera)
The world has grown suspicious of anything that looks like a happily married life.
This is my rule of married life: it's better to be happy than (to be) right.
With twice his wits, she had to see things through his eyes, one of the tragedies of married life. Virginia Woolf (Mrs. Dalloway)
MARRIED MEN
A man (in love) is incomplete until he is has married. Then he's (really) finished.
Zsa Zsa Gabor.
Version: When a man is single, he's incomplete. When he's married, he's finished.
A married man is just a single man who couldn't say no. Coling Tegerdine
All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.
Red Skelton.
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too. H. L. Mencken
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. Jackie Mason
I don't sleep with happily married men. Britt Ekland
I do not think you can name many great inventions that have been made by married men. Nikola Tesla
It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die. Johnny Carson
Telling lies is a fault in a boy, an art in a lover, an accomplishment in a bachelor, and second-nature in a married man. Helen Rowland
There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.
There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is to enjoy earning it. Edgar Watson Howe.
There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.
This is what sexual liberation chiefly accomplishes: it liberates young women to pursue married men. George Gilder
MARRIED WOMEN
No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not. H.L. Mencken
There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.
MARRIED WOMEN vs SINGLE WOMEN
The only really happy folk are married women and single men. H. L. Mencken
Why are married women heavier than single women? Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
MATRIMONY
A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment. Jane Austen
Expect nothing at all and accept as a joyful surprise whatever good you find in matrimony. Frank Leslie
I don't miss being a priest. The fulfillment factor in matrimony is far greater. John J. McLaughlin
Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination. Ambrose Bierce
Matrimony is not a word, it is a sentence.
Version: Matrimony is not a word but a sentence.
Matrimony is the union of meanness and martyrdom. Karl Kraus
Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course. Helen Rowland
(logical / natural outcome, nothing to wonder at, rule, usual usual course / practice).
Single women have a dreadful propensity for being poor. Which is one very strong argument in favor of matrimony. Jane Austen
The critical period in matrimony is breakfast-time. A. P. Herbert
There is no road to wealth so easy and respectable as that of matrimony. Anthony Trollope
You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work. Lee Trevino
MOTHER IN LAW
Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. Hubert H. Humphrey
I find it hard to get along with my mother-in-law.
I know my mother-in-law would drive two hours to go see a movie that I'm in. M. Lynskey
Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport. H. Youngman
Who hasn't had an argument with their mother-in-law. Dervla Kirwan
SINGLE
Being single is definitely better than being with the wrong person.
Being single is getting over the illusion that there is somebody out there to complete you and taking charge of your own life. Omkar Phatakc
Being single is not always a curse. Sometimes it is a blessing because you don't have to worry about being disappointed.
I never feel alone realizing the fact that my life is my only life partner.
I was raised by a strong single mother. Jason Momoa
If you aren't happy single, (then) you won't be happy in a relationship / taken. True happiness comes from within, not from someone else.
If you truly want to be respected by people you love, you must prove to them that you can survive without them.
Single is not a status; it is a word that describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others.
The only really happy folk are married women and single men. H. L. Mencken.
1. people, 2. inf. parents, family
The trouble is not that I am single and likely to stay single, but that I am lonely and likely to stay lonely.
There’s something cool about knowing that your destiny is SO big that you’re not meant to share it with anyone. At least not yet.
When you least expect it is when the person you always dreamt of will finally show up.
Yeah, I’m single, but you’re gonna have to be amazing to change that.
You don’t have to be part of a couple to be happy, you know.
SINGLE MEN
A married man is just a single man who couldn't say no. Coling Tegerdine
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. Jane Austen
The only really happy folk are married women and single men. H. L. Mencken
There is no book so poor that it would not be a prodigy if wholly made by a single man. Samuel Johnson
The notion of the single man began in the 1950's. The idea of the bachelor as a separate life was new and obscure. Hugh Hefner
SINGLE WOMEN
Don't ignore the love you DO have in your life by focusing on the love you DON'T. Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass
Most of my friends in New York are single women or gay men. Sarah Jessica Parker
Single women have a dreadful propensity for being poor. Which is one very strong argument in favor of matrimony. Jane Austen
“Single” is an opportunity to live life on your own terms and not apologize. Mandy Hale
The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass
There are some places in life where you can only go alone. Embrace the beauty of your solo journey. Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass
Toxic people will pollute everything around them. Don’t hesitate. Fumigate. Mandy Hale, The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass
SINGLEHOOD
I had thought a lot about unmarried life during my years as an unmarried woman - which was all during my 20s and into my 30s. I was someone who didn't have a ton of relationships as a single person - and so I had a sharp identification with singlehood. Rebecca Traister
I've heard that we come on earth in pairs, get separated only to meet once again through marriage. So whoever is there on this earth for me will eventually get paired with me. Till then, I'll enjoy my singlehood.Rani Mukerji
It no longer makes sense to see singlehood and marriage as two distinct and stable social categories that should be accorded different legal rights and social esteem. S. Coontz
Singlehood is an opportunity to live life on your terms and not apologize.
Women blame men for their own singlehood. Tracy McMillan
WIFE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. Proverb
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats. Woody Allen
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. Oscar Wilde.
Choose a wife rather by your ear than your eye. An ideal wife is any woman who has an ideal husband.
Generally speaking, my wife is generally speaking. Henny Youngman
Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far / way happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife.
I am thinking of taking a fifth wife. Why not? Solomon had a thousand wives and he is a synonym for wisdom. John Barrymore
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me. Rodney Dangerfield
I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. Rodney Dangerfield
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago. Will Roger.
If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman: she will be all ears. Sigmund Freud
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. Jane Austen, The opening sentence of "Pride and Prejudice."
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass. Rodney Dangerfield
Medicine is my lawful wife and literature my mistress; when I get tired of one, I spend the night with the other. Anton Chekhov
My first wife, I’ll never forget her… and I’ve tried. Redd Foxx
My toughest fight was with my first wife. Muhammad Ali.
My wife and I love each other very much. Stephen Hawking
My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met. R. Dangerfield
My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years to have breakfast together, but it was so disagreeable (that) we had to stop. Winston Churchill.
My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it. Rodney Dangerfield
My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was. Rodney Dangerfield
The fact that my 15 minutes of fame has extended a little longer than 15 minutes is somewhat surprising to me and completely baffling to my wife. Barack Obama
The game is my wife. It demands loyalty and responsibility, and it gives me back fulfillment and peace. Michael Jordan
The love we have in our youth is superficial compared to the love that an old man has for his old wife. Will Durant
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing; either the car or the wife is new.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing either the car is new, or the wife (is). Book (Things mom never told me, Thomas Shubnell)
When I'm doing a movie, I'm not doing anything else. It's all about the movie. I don't have a wife. I don't have a kid. Nothing can get in my way... Quentin Tarantino
I never mind my wife having the last word; in fact, I'm delighted when she gets to it. Walter Matthau, (1920 – 2000) American actor.
WIVES
Choose a wife rather by your ear than your eye. An ideal wife is any woman who has an ideal husband.
Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far / way happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife.
I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.
What makes men indifferent to their wives is that they can see them when they please. Ovid
When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife. Prince Philip
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough. Groucho Marx
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