ONE-LINERS
ONE LINERS WITH A GERUND FOR THE BOOK
***************
Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway * Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it * A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes / I give and you take * Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do * Living alone makes it harder to find someone to blame * A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way, that you actually look forward to going there / the trip * Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have / get your way * Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies *
* I always get / arrive late to / at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
* If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments / think again.
* Eating ice cream and not exercising is great. The downside is your health isn't so good.
* Prejudice is a great time saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts.
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? *
******************************************
* Exercising would be so much more rewarding if calories screamed while you burned them.
* Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
* Happiness is having a large, loving, caring family in another city -
* Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
* Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship's kitchen.
* Marriage is (about) give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.
*
**************************
* Rooting for the offense is the safe way to go. You win either way (support)
A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a (nice) way that you actually/ (will) look forward to the trip * Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter * Age is sth. that doesn't matter, unless you are a (slice/chunk of) cheese * Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else * (It's) (far/way) Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt * (Always) Borrow money from a pessimist - they won't / don't expect it back * Eat healthy / right, stay fit, die anyway * Eating ice cream and not exercising is great. The downside is your health isn't so good * In order for a man to be truly evil, he must be a woman * Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do * Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times * I always get / arrive late to / at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early * I can handle pain, until It hurts * I find it ironic that the colors red, white and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you * I had short hair for a while, but I ended up loving it * I intend to live forever. So far, so good * I've only been wrong once, and that's when I thought I was wrong * I used to be / think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so / quite / too sure * I'm glad I know sign language. It's pretty handy * I'm from Brooklyn. In Brooklyn, if you say, 'I'm dangerous', you'd better be (dangerous) * If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining * If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments / think again * It’s not the fall that kills you; it’s the sudden stop at the end * It is bad luck / unlucky to be superstitious * It's lonely at the top; but you do eat better * Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad * Laugh at your problems, everybody else does * Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship's kitchen * Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak * Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with * Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway * On the other hand, you have different fingers * Prejudice is a great time saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts * So, what if I don't know what apocalypse means!? It's not the end of the world! * The living are dead on holidays * The surest way to be alone is to get married * War does not determine who is right – only who is left * We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public * We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the pólice * Work is for people who don't know how to fish * Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never (get to) happen *
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not quite sure. * I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not (so) sure. * I used to be a banker, but I lost interest. * I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now. * I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time * I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn't help me. * Sleeping comes so naturally to me (that) I could do it with my eyes closed. * I was married by a judge; I should have asked for a jury. * Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. * I've been on a calendar, but never on time. * I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so/quite sure. * Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times * Stop, I can't bear these animal jokes. (a bear talking) * So what if I don't know what apocalypse means!? It's not the end of the world! * To write with a broken pencil is pointless. * * My fear of roses is a thorny issue. I'm not sure what it stems from, but it seems likely I'll be stuck with it. * If there was someone selling drugs in this place, weed know.* Jill broke her finger today, but on the other hand she was completely fine. * If towels could tell jokes they would probably have a dry sense of humor. * I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. * Living alone makes it harder to find someone to blame. * Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too. * You can't blame gravity for falling in love. * Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming. * I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction. * I'm glad I know sign language. It's pretty handy. (helpful, useful. 2 convenient, nearby) * I once heard a joke about amnesia, but I forgot how it goes. * What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway). * Sure, winning isn't every thing; it's the only thing. * It's lonely at the top but you do eat better * It's lonely at the top but the view is quite nice
No hay comentarios:
Publicar un comentario